Explore 12 timeless spiritual pointings accompanied with 100+ powerful quotes.

Phyllis Diller Quotes

Always be nice to your children because they are the ones who will choose your rest home.
Phyllis Diller (Like a Lampshade in a Whorehouse, 2005)
A smile is a curve that sets everything straight.
Phyllis Diller
A bachelor is a guy who never made the same mistake once.
Phyllis Diller
Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing up is like shoveling the walk before it stops snowing.
Phyllis Diller
Right from the start my parents had left me to fend for myself. Apparently unaware that I was a kid, they invariably treated me like an adult, perhaps because they themselves were no spring chickens.
Phyllis Diller (Like a Lampshade in a Whorehouse, 2005)
We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up.
Phyllis Diller
Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age - as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight.
Phyllis Diller
Aim high, and you won't shoot your foot off.
Phyllis Diller
The reason women don't play football is because eleven of them would never wear the same outfit in public.
Phyllis Diller
I was born at home on newspapers... I still have a story on my butt, although now the print is much larger.
Phyllis Diller (Like a Lampshade in a Whorehouse, 2005)
Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
Phyllis Diller (Housekeeping Hints, 1966)
You know you're getting old when your back starts going out more than you do.
Phyllis Diller (Housekeeping Hints, 1966)
If it weren't for baseball, many kids wouldn't know what a millionaire looked like.
Phyllis Diller


Phyllis Diller Biography

Born: July 17, 1917

Phyllis Diller is an American actress and comedian. She is best known for her different perfomances in television.

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Notable Works
Housekeeping Hints (1966)
Like a Lampshade in a Whorehouse (2005)

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